


in the dragon's lair

by triplesalto



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/F, First Meetings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-08
Updated: 2018-02-08
Packaged: 2019-03-15 09:08:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13610115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/triplesalto/pseuds/triplesalto
Summary: Why didn’t they makemanualsfor this sort of thing? You never knew when bards were being poetic, after all. A nice clear manual would go a long way.





	in the dragon's lair

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Icie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Icie/gifts).



“Um,” Prince Geoffrey said eloquently, staring around at his loyal companions.

Go on a quest, they’d said. It’ll be great. King Nkem’s daughter has been kidnapped by a dragon, and if you rescue her he’ll reward you handsomely and the bards will spread your fame throughout all the Eleven Kingdoms. 

Geoffrey, who’d had a particular reason for wanting his fame spread across the Eleven Kingdoms at the moment, had listened to the reconnaissance assessment of the dragon’s lair (it was a very _small_ dragon, word had it, although of course all dragons were dangerous beasts) and called for his companions. Rescuing princesses from dragons was just the sort of thing you wanted to do if you were a young prince. Shows gumption and all that.

Now look where it’d got him. Why didn’t they make _manuals_ for this sort of thing? You never knew when bards were being poetic, after all. A nice clear manual would go a long way.

His second-in-command, a former pirate named Viktor, was looking at him like he was crazy. They’d been together what, six months now? Geoffrey liked to think that they’d become rather good friends. Why hadn’t Viktor warned him? He could have developed a suspicious cough and demanded they go back to civilization to find a wizard to break whatever foul enchantment had obviously been laid upon him, and then, oh, events would have intervened and they never would have ended up here, standing in the dragon’s lair looking at the bier of the sleeping Princess Nnedi.

“So how do we wake her up?” he’d said, cheerful in his naiveté. How was he supposed to know that for once the bards actually _meant_ what they said, and he had to kiss her to break the spell? Usually the bards were taking poetic liberties with everything – that’s why dragons were said to be larger than a castle, when in reality a skinny princess was about all they could carry, and why no doubt he would be rendered a muscled giant of a man in his own saga, when in reality he was a bit short and weedy. 

Now there was a princess he needed to kiss, and when it didn’t work he was going to have some very confused companions. 

“Does it have to be me?” he whispered out of the side of his mouth to Viktor. 

Viktor continued to look at him like he was crazy. Geoffrey sighed.

A year ago, when Prince Geoffrey of the Northlands had fallen into despair at the recalcitrance of his parents and determined to win his heart’s desire by means of a cunning stratagem, he had found a ready ally in his twin. Geoffrey would journey in secret to a monastery high in the Eastern Mountains, where he would commune with nature and paint the masterpieces burning within his soul. His twin would take his place, swanning around the Kingdoms swinging a sword around and doing flashy things so their parents heard of their heir’s exploits and never realized that he was missing. Eventually the two would reunite, journey home together, and present their parents with proof of two things: that Geoffrey was determined to never, ever take the throne (preferring the company of birds and paintbrushes to the headaches of rule), and that Gemma was entirely capable of ruling instead.

So far it’d all gone according to plan. However, Geoffrey (and everyone else) had neglected to mention that kissing princesses might be required. Gemma’s disguise, however flawless it might be in other respects, would hardly stand up to _magic_. If a prince was required to break Nnedi’s spell, Gemma was shit out of luck.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, however. And she couldn’t exactly just turn around and march out of the dragon’s lair. First of all, the dragon might return and smell that humans had been there and retaliate by hurting its prisoner. Second, that would be exactly the way to get a horrible reputation for being an utter jackass – it’d probably get told as “the time that Prince Geoffrey refused to save a princess from a dragon because she wasn’t pretty enough”, and not only would Geoffrey be pissed, that was exactly the way wars tended to get started. King Nkem would not be amused.

So, taking her courage in both hands, Gemma stepped forward, balanced gingerly on the side of the mountain of gold that the princess was sleeping on, and leaned in to kiss her.

She’d barely had time to register the relieved intake of breath from her companions – _just you wait, boys_ , she thought sourly – before something very unexpected happened.

The princess opened her eyes.

Gemma blinked down at her. 

“Oh, thank the stars,” Nnedi said. “I thought I’d never be rescued. Magic is so _tricky_.”

“It certainly is,” Gemma said, feeling lost at sea. She remembered her manners, and bowed. “I’m Prince Geoffrey, and I’m here to rescue you from this foul dragon.”

Nnedi’s eyebrows snapped together. “But you can’t be.”

Gemma froze mid-bow. “I assure you –”

“The magic wouldn’t _work_ with a prince,” Nnedi said. “It’s ‘true love’s first kiss’, after all, and even if you fudge that a little for ‘potential true love’, because nobody knows if some random rescuer is going to be your true love or not, my true love would never be a prince.”

“You… don’t like royalty?” This day was getting stranger by the minute. “But… you’re royalty?”

Nnedi looked at her like Viktor had earlier. Really, Gemma was going to write that manual _herself_ , if nobody else would. This was getting out of hand. “My true love wouldn’t be a prince, she’d be a _princess_.”

“Oh,” Gemma said.

But, as she was rumbled, she smiled, and extended her hand. “Whoever I am, right now I’m the person who’s going to defeat that dragon I can hear coming in for landing. Would you care for a ride back to the palace when I’m done?”

Nnedi took her hand and looked up into her face, a slow smile pulling at her lips. “Yes, my lady,” she said. “And you can tell me the whole story along the way.”

Ah well. Plans were made to be broken anyway. And Nnedi’s eyes did sparkle…

Gemma smiled and drew her sword, heading out into the sunshine to conquer the dragon.

-


End file.
